Shamaina Destin, Class III
My poem is about the expectations placed on black women and how that as a result has affected my view on society. It also mentions how people in the community contribute to the harsh treatment of black women. My main inspiration was myself and how my experience as a black woman has already been tainted by these assumptions/expectations for black women. It just reflects how frustrating and hypocritical society is when black women are the subject.
I am certain
that I am not a loving person
because love does not run in my veins
as a result I steal it from every little thing
started at a very young age
inventing new ways
so my love could be displayed
but the smoke of their ignorance
made my love fade away
replaced by nothingness
matching the look on my face
recalling the times they slowly stole
the one thing I could not replace:
my light.
it’s all gone
the constant fight
to go on
and despite
what you may perceive
I am not strong
that is just a façade
black women are forced to take on
the narrative constantly changing so that we are in the wrong
the expectations list is overwhelmingly long
all while we are given the bare minimum
expected to take care of everyone
expected to be promiscuous
expected to be independent
expected to be ratchet
expected to succeed
but when we do it’s a question of our femininity?
we devote our lives to our community
but it’s them who are constantly failing me
abusing us physically and verbally
calling us fast for showing our knees
putting us down for being ourselves
all while you sell yourselves
to those who will only use you and put you away on a shelf
just being a black women
In itself
is dangerous to my health
and I don’t have generations upon generations of wealth
so excuse me for expecting the adults in my life to be of help
and expressing the negative emotions that I’ve felt
But in a world where they police those who are urban
you cannot expect me to be a loving person